Sunrise was a little less bright yesterday as my friend Janet Bagdy died peacefully while the sun edged over the horizon. Beautiful as she was, her loveliness reached deep into her spirit. She was kind and generous, smart, sweet and funny; the complete package most would say. This photo, taken at her daughter Jessica’s wedding last June, was a favorite of her sister Cathy’s. Janet raved about the fabulous time she’d had at the wedding, never once leaving the dance floor. It was the best gift a daughter could give a mother.

And last night I too was given a special gift. I dreamed about Janet. After my mom died, she also visited me quite frequently in my dreams. Such dreams are a wonderful way to still feel a connection to a loved one we’ve lost. Last night my dream was a series of vignettes, most of which I can’t remember, but in the last part we were on a beach together. She was laughing and happy. To me this symbolized her joy for being liberated from the disease that had ravaged her body.

Janet and I had that rare type of friendship ~ spanning four decades, and even when we were apart for years, when we’d reconnect we could pick right up where we left off. Our last visit was spent sharing memories, laughing at our crazy college antics, looking through old photos and listening to music from the late 70’s.

It was two weeks ago and though the visit only lasted a couple days, it was an incredibly meaningful time.

Janet had a fighting spirit and she fought valiantly, but when she made the difficult choice for hospice care, it was she who helped others by being so brave about the decision. She knew how fortunate she was to have such a loving and caring family who gathered around her, tending to her needs and offering love and comfort during her last months, weeks and hours. This is as much a tribute to them as it is to her. And although she was ready to go, and no one who loved her would have wanted her to suffer, she has left an incredible void in all our hearts.

As Cathy said last night, “I am so sad. I really want to hear her voice again.”

And I want to laugh with my friend on the beach again…

The night is bright with a starlit sky.  I sit and think as time passes by, Oh starry night with a moonlit sky, take me away and tell me why.  Give me a reason for love’s end, give me a reason for why I lost a friend.  I sit and think all night.    Author Unknown.